Earth Day and Growing Old

I feel old when I'm tired out and weak. I mean really really old. I'd imagine myself to be a 90 year old lady and tried to feel less frustrated at my weakness. Then also I could empathise with old people and offer up my feelings to God for them and for my old Grandma at home. Grandma is close to 90 now. Thank God she's still able to walk, though a little unsteadily.

Today the thought of getting older had not crossed my mind. Today I turned forty one and felt good, young and energetic. Yet eminently today I stumbled upon passages and verses that set me to think and remind me not to think that age is a bothering factor. Ha ha ha! First the Our Daily Bread reading for today "Too Old?" stared me in my face. The Bible passage reading come from Genesis 17:15-22. God was telling Abraham to expect a son by Sarah, his lawful wife. Abraham was then a hundred years old and Sarah was 90. Yet God proved that nothing was too hard for Him. God fulfils every promise He made in His time. When all seem without hope, there is always hope in God and faith in Him will carry us through.

Dee surprised me with a bouquet delivery and a message that goes:

Lizzie!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY FRIEND!!!!!

and remember.............."age does not make us childish, as some say; it finds us true children."

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

All my love, Dee OOOXXX

I'm not that old, am I!!???

Thank you God for friends that worry and fret lest I think I'm getting too old.

The cold North wind slackened

My room has always been the stuffiest room. Its windows face east and its door faces west. The winds seldom blow in these two direction. A shelter built for the horticulture behind the room kept out the rain but at the same time blocked off any light breeze that might come in through the windows. But for now, the strong north winds blows steadily and sends its coldness throughout the building.
"Don't know where to sit. Go to the hall also cold, sit in the room also cold, lie down with blanket on the bed also cold!" said Emily, one of the residents. Exactly so. In the night, it is so cold, my toes felt like ice under the coverings.
Today, however, the sun shone harder and the velocity of the wind had slackened a little. It felt good to be out in the sun with the wind blowing. The same feeling I get being outdoor in the summer of 1997 in England. I took the route through the courtyard each time I went to and fro my room.
My roommate said it is a day to laze. As it turned out, I couldn't do much work on the computer. I spent the morning spring-cleaning my room with help from a student volunteer. In the afternoon I was not seated properly and tired out quickly trying to use both hands to type. I spent the evening writing out my CNY greeting cards with Lan Mui helping me and confiding in me. I prayed with her before she turn to bed. After that, Elaine called to say she is coming over with James to pick up two pieces of wooden ramps.

Eclosed Hawkmoth-Enpinanga borneensis

Enpinanga borneensis is the name of this hawkmoth which Gan left on my table for me last week. It was 6 plus in the evening when I returned to my room after dinner today. Seeing that the moth had eclosed spurred me to do a double quick wash up. Then out with my camera, plastic bags (I usually get good picture results with a grey plastic bag as the background for a closeup), book-light (for backup lighting), pen or a stick to pick up my star and get it into position and a rubber non-slip mat too, to rest my hands in a steady position.

Some unusual props indeed. Anything just so I can get a good enough picture for my keeping. Since I can't hold a camera up at all, I got to count on my subject to co-operate with me. Moths are more accommodating in this than butterflies. I must add, that's for me, coz I know you can just as easily capture a butterfly, newly eclosed, on camera.

I clicked away and got a number of blurred shots. Finally I decided I spent enough time on it and let it go on a shrub outside my room. This is about the clearest shot I took.

Why '1 Caterpillar'.

At forty, I'm really begining to feel faulty everywhere!
One would think that at this age I have learn everything about myself. Not so. Everyday presents something new that I need learning to cope. Living with SMA isn't easy. In many ways I liken myself to a caterpillar journeying through life towards that final transformation that will free me from my physical disability. As a Catholic, I looked to what's beyond.
There's a purpose for our existant. Life is, to me, a school that I may learn and be transformed by what I learnt; a journey filled with exciting things waiting to be discovered. Things that point me towards the Creator of the universe. Life has it's ups and downs, but I'm thankful all the same. 1 Caterpillar's Notebook is where I can share my personal encounters and discovery.

What is SMA? I belong to tpye II
Link to our association: MDAS